School is really hard right now.
We started Pharm and pathbio about 3 weeks ago, and have our first set of exams next week. Pharm is really hard. And painful. More painful than the last few miles of a half marathon.
This was a really hard week – knowing you have exams next week but still getting slammed with 7 hours of new material every day, so that studying the last 3 weeks of material is impossible.
It’s just hard. And there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Nobody can do the studying for me. I just have to endure and press on. Third year will come, just keep pressing on. I’m not looking for sympathy. I know what I have to do.
Just suck it up.
In case you were wondering how 2nd year of medical school is. It’s kind of horrible (right now, at least). I feel terrible saying that. I hate feeling this way, because I want to love school. But the truth is I love where school will take me. I don’t love studying on Friday nights. I don’t love always having to turn down invitations to get to know new people, or spend time with old friends. I don’t love going full days without a real conversation with a real person.
Despite all of this, I still remain encouraged. Even though I may feel like a prisoner to the 1000 pages of notes that I need to learn, God reminds me that I am indeed free. Perfectly free. Free from having to worry about anything. For even as he clothes the lilies and feeds the birds, surely he will take care of me. He will provide for me. He will give me the grace and strength to do that which he’s called me to do.
Because He is strong, and He loves me.